Dating After Loss

2026 – Bring it on~

New memories, with new friends and the oldies but goodies- my besties.

If you know me, then you know that for years I have been saying, “How could I ever date again after having the most fulfilling marriage of 26 years?”  I didn’t get divorced; my husband died of Cancer.

So, one night after a couple of drinks of liquid courage, I signed up for a dating service to see if I could find someone to “fill the gap in my heart,” and here is what I learned after the 1st and only date:

1. I need someone who can look me in the eyes.

2. I need someone curious about me and just life in general.

3. I need someone who can talk intelligently about the world.

4. I need someone who knows how to order food and has proper table manners.

5. I need someone who can show up and wants to make a good impression.

6. I need someone who does not talk badly about their family.

7. I need someone who is funny, witty, and treats everyone with respect.

8. And last but not least, someone who can handle their booze.

You know, I came out of my first date thinking – what the heck? I know I have my own issues, but I try to make everyone I meet feel like they are the most important person in the room.

I immediately paused my dating service and went back to asking myself about the gap in my heart – what is it that I am exactly trying to fill?

If I go back up above to all items 1-8, all of my friends fill those needs. So, while I may “think” I need to find a human to do life with, I think having really great friends is enough.

And maybe, just maybe, I will go back to a friend of a friend of a friend. Who better than a friend to know you well enough to make an introduction?

I spent the holidays with my best friends and rang in the New Year with a girlfriend of over 15 years. I felt strong, loved, and for the first time, not sad about the New Year or being alone in life.

New memories, with new friends and the oldies but goodies- my besties.

2026 – Bring it on~